Stories · Curiosities · Questionable Ideas · Rather a Lot of Imagination · Farah Sam · Author & Creator ·
CELESTIAL
QUILL
PUBLISHING
When Marco's skin starts to itch....
YOU KNOW IT'S A VERY HOT SUMMER
"5-stars" - Celestial Quill Press
Marco Delvaux, a charming, perpetually broke barman of thirty-five, has spent his life coasting on Uncle Max's old promise of an inheritance and his late father Marc's gleeful ghostly commentary, which only Marco can hear. When his flamboyant mother Muriel sweeps home with six trunks and a fresh romantic catastrophe, and Uncle Max suddenly produces a long-lost daughter, Maya — a calm, capable vet who threatens to halve Marco's golden inheritance — Marco throws himself into a doomed scheme: brewing an artisanal hair tonic, The Signatüre Collection, in his friend Oliver's garage, while vegan-shop owner Daphne Westcott keeps asking him pointed, practical questions he refuses to answer honestly.
The product sells out gloriously at the Easter Fair launch, then very publicly turns half the village green, several beloved pets, and one philosophical goat a chemical shade of disaster. In the wreckage, every ounce of Marco's performed confidence collapses — and what's underneath it turns out to be worth knowing. The village's actual machinery reveals itself too: Maya and Marco's oldest friend James Spencer prove unexpectedly good together, Daphne is infuriatingly right about everything, and Marco, with nothing left to sell, finally tells the truth about himself to absolutely no one but himself. By the time the parish forgives him over egg sandwiches and Lady Helen marries Charles Spencer, something has quietly shifted — the itch on Marco's arm has gone still for the first time in years, and St. Emerly has begun rebuilding him into someone slightly less ridiculous than before.
The FIRST BOOK
IN THE HILARIOUS
MARCO DELVAUX SERIES.
Marco Delvaux &
The Signature Formula
What People are saying (about Marco...)
"My husband had a pension plan before Marco sat down in our kitchen. Forty-eight hours later I had a garage full of unlicensed shampoo, a cat with a green ear, and Oliver describing himself as an entrepreneur. The baby's first word was 'OLIVER.' I believe this is Marco's fault."
(She has a folder. It is labelled EVIDENCE.)
~ Pippa Huckleberry
(Oliver's wife. Long-suffering.)
The village has opinions. The village always has opinions.
"At the Easter Fair, Marco arrived twenty minutes late, visibly dishevelled, stood directly in front of the artisanal jam display for the entire opening ceremony, and at one point — I have this documented — began giving a tourist a personal guided tour of the green as though he had organised it. He had not organised it. I had organised it. I have been organising it since 2009. He has never once offered to help with the bunting."
(The north side was four centimetres lower than the south side. He did not notice. Nobody noticed. This is also his fault somehow.)
~ Davina Westcott — Village Events Committee / General Authority
"He gave my wife Pauline what I can only describe as an unnecessarily prolonged goodbye on the harbour front last May. I then gave him what I can only describe as a perfectly proportionate response. He turned up to work the next morning with a black eye and told Angus he'd walked into a door. He had not walked into a door. I am the door. I want that on the record."
~ Trevor Bottomley-Hatch
(husband of Pauline. Marco has met Pauline. Trevor is aware.)
"He rearranged my entire back bar in what he called a 'flow audit.' I haven't found the bottle opener since Tuesday. Three separate tourists told me he was 'the soul of the place.' I served them their drinks in complete silence and they still tipped him."
(He has not found the bottle opener. He has looked.)
~ Angus MacGregor,
The Jolly Taxpayer
"Tremendous venture. Tremendous. Yes, there were one or two incidents with the hair. But the boy had initiative, he had a formula, he had a label — and frankly the label was very good. I've backed worse ideas with considerably more money and considerably less charm. Would I fund it again? I'd have to see the revised pH figures first. But broadly — yes. Broadly, yes I would."
(He would. He absolutely would. He already has a new idea. It involves printing.)
~ Uncle Max Delvaux
(Marco's uncle. Funded the shampoo. Considers this irrelevant.)
"Forty-one years of barbering. I have never seen what that shampoo did to Derek Plum's fringe at the Easter Fair. It didn't fall out so much as make a considered decision to leave. All at once. In public. I now have a intake form. Question 7: 'Have you recently used any product sourced from a garage?'"
~ Arthur 'Nick' Shave — The Final Cut
"Four months of silence. Then a voicemail: 'Clarissa, hope you're well, tremendous summer isn't it.' It was November. I now scan his milk with a very particular energy. He has the decency to look slightly ashamed. It's the most emotional honesty I've had from the man."
~ Clarissa Fudge-Whittle,
St. Emerly Sainsbury's
(briefly dated Marco. does not wish to elaborate.)
"I attended Harrow. I ran a company. I once had lunch with a cabinet minister and he described me as 'formidably composed.' My son is currently employed as a barman, has a business plan involving artisanal shampoo, and was yesterday outsmarted by a seagull. I comment. Nobody hears me. This is, in many ways, the hardest part."
(He is, underneath it all, rather proud. He would never say so. He says so constantly to the empty room.)
~ Marc Delvaux — Marco's Father. Deceased. Still Present.
Coming soon...More Books In This Series
Marco Delvaux: The Printing Expert.
After the shampoo disaster, Marco decides that printing might be the respectable business opportunity he has been waiting for. Armed with enthusiasm, confidence, and very little practical wisdom, he launches himself into flyers, business cards, orders, mistakes, and customers with impossible expectations. In a village where every typo becomes public knowledge, Marco learns that printing success is not as simple as pressing a button.
Marco Delvaux: The Real Estate Agent.
Marco enters the world of property with polished shoes, big promises, and the belief that he can sell almost anything. But in St. Emerly, every cottage has a story, every neighbour has an opinion, and every viewing seems to reveal more than it should. What begins as a career move soon becomes a comedy of secrets, rivalries, awkward tours, and houses that refuse to behave.
Marco Delvaux: The Suits Expert.
Determined to reinvent himself as a man of taste and success, Marco becomes convinced that the right suit can change everything. But style, status, and self-image are dangerous things in a village full of sharp eyes and sharper tongues. As Marco chases elegance and authority, he finds himself tangled in tailoring, vanity, ambition, and the uncomfortable truth that clothes can only hide so much.
Marco Delvaux: The Limo Driver.
Marco imagines life as a limo driver will be glamorous, impressive, and perhaps even mysterious. Instead, he finds himself chauffeuring villagers, secrets, romantic complications, and conversations he was never meant to hear. Behind the wheel, Marco discovers that every passenger carries baggage — and in St. Emerly, some journeys are far more revealing than their destinations.
Marco Delvaux: The Insurance Agent.
Marco’s latest respectable plan leads him into the world of insurance, where policies, paperwork, and promises of safety seem reassuringly sensible. But the people of St. Emerly have a gift for turning ordinary incidents into dramatic claims, suspicious stories, and emotional emergencies. As Marco tries to calculate risk, he slowly realises he may be the riskiest part of the whole operation.
Marco Delvaux: The Crypto Expert.
Marco discovers cryptocurrency and immediately begins behaving as though he has unlocked the future of money. With charts he barely understands, digital coins he cannot fully explain, and advice nobody requested, he becomes St. Emerly’s most confident financial visionary. But when modern ambition collides with village scepticism, gossip, and Marco’s talent for misunderstanding things, the result is a very contemporary comedy of confusion.
Marco Delvaux is a 12-book diary-style romantic comedy series set in the English coastal village of St. Emerly. The best way to describe it: Bridget Jones meets Lovesick, with the warmth of Downton Abbey and the social chaos of a very bad shampoo product.
At its heart, it follows Marco Delvaux — a charming, 35-year-old village man in perpetual reinvention — whose disastrous get-rich schemes, misguided romances, and very public humiliations slowly guide him toward real love, genuine self-awareness, and a life worth keeping. Each book covers one calendar month and one new scheme, running across a full year of village life.
The tone is warm, witty, and lightly absurd — British classic village humour with hilarious internal monologues from Marco, running gags, a ghost only Marco can see (his late father, Marc, who provides dry military commentary), and one quiet emotional truth per book where the humour drops for a real, human moment.
The series spans two very slowly unfolding romances — Marco and the ethereal Daphne Westcott, and Dr. James Spencer, Marco's best friend, with Maya Delvaux, Marco's cousin — both unfolding across all 12 books, with weddings as the payoff in the final books. The cardinal rule: attraction comes last, never first.
The Marco Delvaux Series
Even More Marco and St. Emerly coming in 2027.
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Marco Delvaux: The Magician
After one too many ordinary failures, Marco decides his life needs a little magic. With props, dramatic pauses, and a dangerous amount of confidence, he attempts to reinvent himself as a magician. But in a village already full of secrets, misdirection, and people who know too much, Marco’s illusions may reveal far more than they hide.
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Marco Delvaux: The Signature Chef
Marco steps into the kitchen with ambition, flair, and the belief that a signature dish is mostly about confidence. But food has opinions, villagers have stronger ones, and family expectations are never far from the table. As sauces simmer and egos rise, Marco’s culinary dream becomes a deliciously chaotic comedy of taste, pride, romance, and possible indigestion.
Marco Delvaux: The Saint
Marco begins to suspect that life may be guided by a Higher Intelligence — not in a religious way, but in the unsettling sense that events keep arranging themselves with suspicious comic timing. Determined to become wiser, calmer, and more spiritually impressive, he soon discovers that enlightenment is difficult when the village refuses to stop testing your patience.
Marco Delvaux: The Millionaire
Marco has always liked the idea of wealth, preferably with admiration, comfort, and a little public recognition. When the possibility of becoming a millionaire enters his world, ambition awakens, old tensions resurface, and everyone seems to have an opinion about what Marco should do next. But money has a strange way of revealing what people truly value — especially in a village that notices everything.
Marco Delvaux: The Marriage
Love, family, history, reputation, and village opinion collide as Marco faces his most unpredictable adventure yet: marriage. With emotions running high, old stories resurfacing, and half of St. Emerly apparently invested in the outcome, Marco must decide what kind of man he has become. Warm, funny, romantic, and gloriously chaotic, this final chapter brings Marco face to face with a life he can no longer plan his way out of.
© 2026 E.F. Sam / Celestial Quill Publishing. All rights reserved. The Marco Delvaux series, including its characters, settings, artwork, stories, and related materials, is fictional and protected by copyright. Any resemblance to real persons, living or deceased, places, businesses, or events is purely coincidental. No content may be copied, reproduced, or used without permission.
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